Our shower is pathetic. It is a trickle of water that switches from icy cold to smoldering hot in a matter of seconds. It takes so long to rinse and I feel like I’m going to walk out of the shower and be like Kramer (come on, you can remember the episode, with the soap running down his pant leg). Anyway, the good thing is that the shower is our shower and you don’t need to walk down the hall and take a shower in a sketchy “what the hell is that on the floor” shower.
The full English buffet breakfast was alllll meat. They did have beans and weird fried eggs but we barely made the cut off for breakfast (9:30) so we opted for bowls of cereal. We still got coffee and “brown” toast. Oh Pauline, I miss your brown bread made fresh daily. I miss walking up the stairs at night, smelling the delicious bread, anticipating the forthcoming meal.
We headed for Borough Market which was near the Tower of London and the tower bridge. It wasn’t really what I was expecting. I didn’t think that it was purely a food market but it all looked soo good. There was one stall of Turkish Delights and they had tower of baklava. omg.
We exited Borough Market in search of the Tower Bridge. We crossed the London Bridge (which is not the tower bridge) and we could see it in the distance. But how do you get there? I took over the navigating, because I am an expert and all. Garmin ain’t got nothing on me. (Sometimes I am like the Garmin in DC and if you have experienced the Garmin in DC you would know that sometimes I don’t know where the hell I am going) But thankfully we managed to find the way and we ran into The Monument. Yes that is really the name.
Then we decided to go into the Tower on London. Pari really liked how lions were kept at the gates to scare people away (go figure). Overall it was kinda interesting I guess. There was a room that showed all of the crowns and the biggest diamond in the world that was cut into 13 different pieces for crowns. There was one tower, the Salt tower I think, that held prisoners. It was pretty neat. Very overpriced though at 14 pounds a person.
It was a little hot outside and my arm was really starting to hurt. I am almost completely positive that it is a pulled muscle. The story of my pulled muscle (from Wednesday night)…Pari is often very demanding as the night wears on. I was going to turn of the light and I thought I would be funny so I pulled our two single beds apart- and then- a shooooooting pain up my arm. The practical joke wasn’t very funny in the end.
We finally found the Tower Bridge and bought some hot nuts. They were very excellent and the man gave us a deal, 2 for 3 pounds. He asked if I wanted hot nuts and I said yes. Then he went to get the nuts from this second and uttered something and laughed. It was very creepy so I just got my hot nuts and walked off..haha
The bridge is pretty cool. My first fear: Airplanes. 2nd: Heights. 3rd: Bridges. If you sum all of those together you get my major fear. Falling from a great distance into the water. The bridge was a little scary, especially when I looked up.
Then we took the underground to Buckingham Palace. The building itself wasn’t that pretty but it was really big. There were soo many people. We sat at the Fountain for a little while and then decided to walk around Notting Hill.
Notting Hill was very disappointing. I had such high hopes. Notting Hill is my favorite movie of all time. Yes, I am a sucker for romantic comedies. There wasn’t really a lot going on and Portobello Market was a let down. I didn’t see anything I wanted to look at, much less buy. So we pretty much walked forever until we actually got to the market, walked through the market, and then went to Sausage and Mash Café (aka s&m café). It was in Europe on a Shoestring book. Most of the places in it that we have been have been good but this place was pretty shitty. Pari got veggie sausage and mashed potatoes which were more on the colder side than warm side and I got fish and chips. The fish and chips at Monster Mash was soo good but the fish here was a little sketchy and fish creeps me out in the first place. Overall it filled the overwhelming need to eat but nothing else really.
On the underground back to the hotel there was this little boy. He started picking his nose and then I nudged Pari to look. Pari says the boy winked at her while picking his nose. Haha. I wonder why. Two minds think alike?
We regrouped at the hotel on bought tickets for the London Eye. The S&M café wasn’t very satisfying…or filling so we decided to go to Café du Hong Kong. It was realllly good. We ordered so much food. I got a rice with tofu and veggies and pari got noodles with tofu and mushrooms. And we also got a side of stir fried veggies. It was so flavorful and good. There was no fork though. I halfway learned how to use chopsticks but thankfully they gave you a big ass spoon. I only felt a little retarded when I was putting the big ass spoon in my mouth in a restaurant of certified Asians using chopsticks. Pari got a Mango Peach icy pearl drink. She is so silly…
Then we went to see Big Ben and Parliament. It was really neat. This was probably the only time in London when I was like, wow this is amazing.
Then we went to the garden that was next to Parliament. Ok, so I think Brits have a weird fascination with perverse statues. Look at this one…
Look, the man is not only touching a man’s ass but he’s also fondling another man’s shwinga linga. Jesus.
We still had a good hour till our London Eye thing. We chose to do it later at night (9pm) so it would get a little dark and everything would be lit up. It was pretty I guess. I was terrified the whole time. Remember my earlier discussion of my greatest fear…well yeah. And it didn’t help that there were a bunch of loud Spanish students, about 10 I would say. We are in this glass capsule and these kids were pretty much screaming. It was making me very anxious. At one point it was like everyone was on one side of the capsule. I kept thinking to myself that it was going to be too heavy on that side and we were just going to fall into the water. Once we reached the very top of the wheel it was a lot better. Going down isn’t as scary. In no way do I regret doing it but I don’t think I would do it again.
When we got to the hotel there was a drunk man passed out on the sidewalk right in front of the hotel. It was scary. The young receptionist girl was pretty worried about it to. She called the police and kept on making sure the guy had woken up. For the most part there wasn’t a lot of drunks or homeless people. Edinburgh had the most. Paris had the scariest.
We watched the Russell Brand show (the guy from Forgetting Sarah Marshall). He is really funny but the theme of the show was kinda gross. It was about pets and there was this one lady who was having sex with the dog and the husband had the dog castrated. And then it showed another clip of the woman talking about their horses and how her favorite horse is too young to “show him her love” but he often jumps on her. Grosss grosss gross grossss. Ok. Sorry. I guess I could have left this whole thing out. Point being: Russell Brand is very funny and I wish this show was on in the States.
Russell Brand
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